Q&A: I'm Engaged During A Pandemic...What Now?
Well, nobody could’ve predicted this one! I’m sure this is NOT what you had envisioned for your engagement, nor the stress you thought you’d be feeling around wedding planning…but here we are. As I mentioned in my last post about Micro Weddings (read it here), this is unchartered territory for everyone, so there is no “right” or “wrong” way to do things, and at the end of the day, you need to make the decision that’s best for YOU. With that being said, there are many decisions that do need to be made (one way or another). In an attempt to de-clutter the web of options out there, I’ve asked your most pressing questions to a group of talented wedding vendors. Below are their answers….hopefully this helps guide you towards making the decision that’s right for your situation.
Picking A New Date
Q: I need to postpone the date but I don’t know when to reschedule it to. How do you pick a new date?
A: If you are set on a specific season, then stick to it and start researching dates with your vendors or planner. If you don’t want to wait a full year, then explore other seasons or even “off season” months. Most venues will be less expensive in these months. - Honey + Thyme Events
Vendor Contracts
Q: I’m now planning a new wedding date….How do I protect myself when it comes to vendor contracts?
A: The thing to remember first is that you chose vendors that you love and they have hopefully been supporting you through this whole process. So if you need to reschedule your date, make sure you do just that and not fully cancel on them. Most vendors will allow you to reschedule within a certain amount of time, so read your initial contract in the reschedule or cancellation clause and see exactly what it says so you're clear when starting the conversation with them about rescheduling. A lot of vendors right now are allowing couples to move their dates with no rescheduling fee, which is very kind, because we are all in this together!
After you have some new date choices from your venue, send those out to your vendors and make sure they are open for them, before selecting the final date with the venue. You would hate to officially set a date, then reach out to vendors, and one of your favorites is already booked…now you’re left looking all over again and you could possibly lose your retainer.
Once everyone is set, book your new date! You should be signing a rescheduling contract with all of the vendors, listing the new date and any other material changes. Also you want to be sure there is a clause in that contract that states all money you have paid thus far will transfer over to the new date. That way, a vendor can’t come back and say that you paid X amount for the previous date and now you owe more.
Right now, most vendors just want to help our couples. Our hearts break for you and what you’re having to deal with and so we are willing help any way we can. - Dawn Marie Photo
A: Make sure you thoroughly read through each contract; though tedious and exhausting, it’s a great way to answer questions you might have. With our current brides signing, it’s something we’ve had to work with each individual on. Vendors should be happy to listen and make amendments that satisfy both the client and vendor. - Look Love Beauty
A: I would look for an Alpha David, or a date change clause. If the contract is pre-COVID, it might not say anything about date changes. You might have to ask the question separately and have the venue add it to the contract. - The Andrews Farm Events
Q: What if we change our date and then learn in a few months that we have to postpone it again? What should I look for in the contracts to protect us financially?
A: If you want to change the date without losing money, this is a venue by venue decision. Each business is handling the situation differently so it is probably best to contact your specific venue. The Andrews Farm Events is personally holding our 2020 pricing for couples who want to move their date. Pricing that could be effected is if we sourced something specific for the couple for their day and that item is non-refundable. - The Andrews Farm Events
Finding A Venue
Q: How do I look for a destination wedding venue if we can’t yet travel?
A: I suggest looking at the websites, google reviews, and asking the venue if they can do a video tour with you to show you around. You could also ask the venue to send you the contact of a past bride who could tell you about their experience. - The Andrews Farm Events
Q: What are some good venues to look at for elopements or small weddings?
A: Venues that are good for COVID elopements are ones that are flexible with your vendors. If you have already picked the vendors you want for your special day and paid deposits, then you do not want to lose that money. Another good quality is an outdoor venue because the restriction on numbers tends to allow more guests. It is also helpful if the venue includes rentals because some rental companies have been shutting down due to this. - The Andrews Farm Events
Photo: Heather Yvonne, Venue: The Andrews Farm Events, Planner: Above and Beyond Event Planning, Florals: Chelish Moore, Rentals: Elegant and Classy Events, Stationary: Shore Thing
Invites (And Un-Invites)
Q: My Save the Dates already went out…how do I communicate to guests that we’re changing our plans? Are new invites necessary, or are virtual ones okay?
A: I have change the date editable downloads on my website that give clients the choice to print their own at home, or send out a PDF! It is all designed, so you just drop in your information.
Virtual invites are also totally ok. We are in unchartered waters and really anything goes right now! The only downside to virtual is tracking down everyone’s emails and/or phone numbers for those guests who were on your mother-in-law’s list, for example. In that case, ask for help to communicate the change! Definitely make the changes on your website! Whether you snail mail, email or text, I would suggest printing just one as a keepsake. Might as well add it to your details pictures! - Sibley Designs
Q: How do I tell guests that I’m postponing the wedding but have to cut the guest list in half?
A: If you haven’t sent your full invites, you can send specific notes to those not on the Plan B list. You can kindly let them know your new intimate celebration has been reduced to a limited guest count and after much deliberation you’ve decided to reduce your guest list. Call or email but avoid text messages. If you plan on hosting a large celebration in the future, you can follow up with an updated invitation to end on a positive note! Honestly, you’ll most likely be surprised by how many guests not only understand, but are a little relieved due to the current landscape. - Honey + Thyme Events
Planning New Details
Q: If we changed our date and are now getting married in a different month/season, how do we find new flowers that still fit into our original vision?
A: I am one that believes most flowers can fit within any season. With a few minor tweaks and a creative florist, you can keep the same vision even in a new season or month. For example - you wanted a spring wedding with Peonies, but are now getting married in December. Let’s substitute Ranunculus and Anemones for those pricey out of season peonies! You will still have the bouncy delicate look as you would have in the spring! - Meraki Blommor
Q: We want to do a small wedding now and a bigger celebration later. How do we stretch our floral budget as much as possible for both events?
A: Two great ways to “stretch” your budget for two events: 1. Faux or dried florals. Everlastings are an awesome way to utilize florals multiple times and you can even repurpose them after the big day. 2. Base your floral needs on the size of the event. Do you REALLY need that massive arbor at your micro wedding? Can we not just take a moment to appreciate you, your partner and your bouquet or boutonnière? Remember that less is more in sweet moments like micro weddings and you can go big if you want on the party or do the total opposite. Have all the florals at the micro wedding for pictures and focus on food/alcohol/music at the party. - Meraki Blommor
Photo: Connection Photography, Florals: Meraki Blommor, Gown: Lovely Bride Charlotte, Venue: North Corner Haven, Hair and Makeup: Look Love Beauty, Suit: OMJ Clothing
Micro Wedding Planning…Which Details Matter?
Q: I’m doing a small ceremony now and a big wedding later on…should I still get hair/makeup done for the small celebration, or is it not worth it?
A: If you are paying for a photographer, I say worth it! It’s still your wedding day and what a better way to treat yourself than getting glammed up. One less worry on your plate that day, and it’s just super relaxing! - Look Love Beauty
Q: What about flowers? Are they necessary for an elopement/micro wedding, and do florists charge differently for smaller events like these?
A: Flowers are never necessary, but think of them like a picture frame. Even though picture frames aren’t NECESSARY, don’t you love highlighting your favorite photos with a frame that speaks to your style and personality? Ultimately nothing is necessary other than the love between you and your partner and the legal documents/officiant - so it is totally up to you how you want that special day to be.
In regards to different pricing for elopements/micro-weddings, our prices are no different. We charge very fairly based on the time and $$ it takes to source, prep, plan, design, execute and deliver your wedding florals. That effort and cost of running your small business doesn’t change based on the size of the occasion. - Meraki Blommor
Q: Do you suggest having a photographer for a micro wedding?
A: As a photographer, of course I say yes! But as a former bride myself, I also say yes. Remember at the end of the day, you’re left with a beautiful marriage and photos. Everything else is consumed or put up for who knows how long, and your photographs are something that can live on daily to remind you of the way everything was on your wedding day, the way you felt, the love that was around you. So yes! They are important.
Pricing for micro weddings and elopements can be more affordable than a wedding day but from my experience Im typically still with my couples for about 6 hours on a micro wedding day, because couples still love the getting ready moments, a bride getting her dress on, a special first look moment, family photos, couple photos, etc… Comparing that to an 8 hour typical wedding day, there isn’t much difference.
Elopements now encompass a range of weddings, from a small courthouse ceremony with photos after, that might take a couple of hours to hiking a mountain and watching the sunset. It really depends on your wedding day and what all you want captured, as to how much money you will save on photography.
Definitely have a consultation with your photographer and chat with them about all the options and what certain hours of coverage might get you. - Dawn Marie Photo
Q: What are some ideas for unique and affordable wedding favors?
A: My biggest tip for wedding favors is to give your guests a consumable gift! Something they can eat/drink or use. A few examples of this include desserts, candles, olive oil, honey, plants or something with a local-infusion like Carolina reaper infused chocolates (not too hot, though!). - Honey + Thyme Events
Restarting The Wedding Countdown…What To Do In The Meantime?
Q: Any ideas on fun events I can throw as a way to stay excited, despite having to postpone the wedding?
A: Microweddings or micro celebrations! Don’t underestimate the power of a gorgeous dinner party to celebrate the date you were going to get married on or a vacation with close friends to the beach or mountains! I think we’re going to see a lot of fun celebrations for the new wedding dates in 2021, focusing on the celebration and love itself instead of the formalities of a wedding. - Honey + Thyme Events
Photo: Phylicia Willis, Venue: The Andrews Farm Events, Planner, Florist and Designer: Seeded Events and Design, Hair and Makeup: The Posh Palette Artistry, Bar: Black Moth Bars, Design: Unspoken Designs, Dress: Meagan Kelly Designs, Rentals: Cooke Rentals
For The Newly Engaged…
Q: I’m newly engaged (yay!!) but am wondering how soon I should be booking my vendors…seems like everyone is getting booked up due to COVID postponements!
A: If you’re having a spring wedding, right now! A lot of spring and summer weddings are being moved within a year out from the original date and so this time next year is really filling up. You’ll want to reach out and get booking soon. If you aren’t financially prepared for all of the retainers right now and that’s why you haven’t reached out, a lot of vendors are working with couples to stagger their retainer payments or they might even be lowering them, to help couples out. - Dawn Marie Photo
Zoom Wedding Tips
Q: I’m doing a Zoom ceremony to broadcast out to my friends and family, and want to make sure my makeup still pops. What tips do you have for doing your own makeup so that it still feels “bridal” even if an expert isn’t there?
A: Extra everything. If you are doing beauty yourself, layer up. This means more coats of mascara or if you feel like you’ve mastered the strip lash (ardell wispies are the best) - go for it. More blush, more bronzer, and define the outer edges of the eyes to open them up so they can be seen from the screen. One of our favorite products for locking everything in place is the Too Faced Peach Perfect matte setting spray! It smells amaaaaazing too! - Look Love Beauty
Hair: Look Love Beauty, Photo: Christy Johnston, Makeup: Catie Starr, Dress: Bhldn, Florals: Flourish Flower Farm