Creating Your Guest List
Someone’s going to have to break it to Great Aunt Betty that she didn’t make the cut
Creating a guest list is one of the first things you’ll want to do. Having a rough idea of this count will help you choose a venue space, as well as stay within budget. The first thing to decide on, of course, is if you envision a large wedding with extended family and friends from afar, or if you prefer an intimate gathering with only immediate loved ones. It helps to start with those guests you’re 100% sure of. Grab your fiance, a pen and paper, and a bottle of wine, and start naming off the people you know you’ll be inviting.
Once you have the core group (let’s be honest, this is the A list), you can begin adding the friends/family you’re a little less close with. Then, off to the side, jot down anyone you’re unsure of (and hope these C-listers never see this piece of paper).
Something important to remember is this: YOU CAN ALWAYS ADD INVITES. YOU CAN’T UNSEND A SAVE THE DATE. (Trust me, we tried). It is more than likely that you’ll be unsure about a few people. Maybe you haven’t seen them in a while. Maybe you’re only friends with them because they’re a part of a larger social group you’re in. Maybe they drink too much at weddings and can’t be trusted (you know you’re thinking of someone here). Whatever the case, hold off on sending them a save the date. You can always send one later, or wait until invites go out.
We realized pretty immediately that we WAY over-invited. Our moms got very excited with the engagement (again, they too had been waiting with me for 7 years in anticipation), and started telling everyone —neighbors, mailmen, you name it—that they couldn’t wait to see them in Hilton Head on May 11th! Our venue, along with most, had a very strict capacity limit. One that we surpassed with save the date recipients. Because of this amateur error, we simply explained to certain friends that, while we would love to invite them, we unfortunately were past capacity limits and needed to wait to get some "No’s” back before we could extend more invites. There we sat, guiltily hoping for sudden divorces or graduations that would take these guests out of the running. Luckily, our RSVPs came back with more declines than we expected, and we were able to extend those additional invites. That being said, take this tale as a precautionary lesson learned. Hold off on over-inviting!! Use save the dates for family and friends you are 1000% sure of, and keep your capacity and budget in mind the entire time!!
